Funny Quotes

Funny

Normally swing underneath them

Boss: Employees like that do not grow on trees you know… You: How true Sir, they normally swing underneath them…

Funny

Sheet I sit

I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit, and on the slitted sheet I sit.

Funny

Notices when you don’t

Housework: No one notices when you do it, but everyone notices when you don’t!

Funny

Drove to another party

Boy1: Yesterday I was too drunk to drive home. Boy2: So what did you do? Boy1: I drove to another party!

Funny

Sitting at the table does not make

Sitting at the table does not make you a diner, Unless you eat some of what’s on that plate. Being in america does not make you an american. Being born in america does not make you an american Proud it where ever you from.

Funny

Un twirling the twine

Un twirling the twine that un twisteth between, He twirls, with his twister, the two in a twine; Then twice having twisted the twines of the twine, He twitcheth the twice he had twined in twain.

Funny

Wont even Start

Height Of Confidence Many Professors Were Once Called. They Were Asked To Sit In An Aeroplane. After they sat they were told that these planes were made by their Students… They all hurried out of the Plane.. But Only One did not Move… He said….. ‘If it is made by the students.. This wont even Start ‘…