If I was meant to be controlled

‘I am sorry’ and ‘I apologise’ mean the same thing… except when you are at a funeral!
For all of you who gossip about me: Thanks for making me the center of your world!
Conscience – The voice that tells you not to do something after you have done it!
Life has no remote, get up and change it yourself!
I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I had any loose fitting clothing, I would not have signed up in the first place!
I used to walk into a room full of people and wonder if they liked me. Now I look around and wonder if I like them!