Using it to hammer in nails

For men who believe their wives don’t do much the whole day, guys it’s a tough job updating your ‘Facebook’ status every hour. Respect women!
Your face is such a mess, when you practice diving why don’t you make sure the pool has water in next time.
Let’s be honest with each other … we have both come here for the same reasons.
I would like to apologize to anyone I have not offended. Please be patient. I will get to you shortly!
A relationship is not Facebook, where you can sign in and out whenever you want!
When you look at me: My heart melts; My eyes twinkle; And my face lightens up!