From the moment I saw you, I knew I was going to spend the rest of my life avoiding you.
Nice perfume, but do you really need to marinate in it?
It’s not that I hate you. It’s just that if you caught fire, I had roast marshmallows!
Some people leave a mark on this world. You will probably leave a stain!
The day I get my driving license is the day you ‘accidentally’ get hit by a car.
Let it be very clear to you – the only asshole I want in my life is the one that I sit on!
I do not have a short temper, I just have a quick reaction to bullshit.
You are so beautiful, sweet and faithful… it’s really a pity that I do not love animals!
Hey! Can you do me a favour, take a pic of urself and send it to me. I am Playing cards and i am mising the JOKER!!!
I am not saying I hate you. I am just saying if you got hit by a bus, I would be driving that bus.