Never wrestle a pig

I refuse to engage in a battle of wits with you since you are unarmed!
For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism.
It’s okay to be ugly… but aren’t you overdoing it!
You started at the bottom… and it’s been downhill ever since!
Oh, I offended you with my opinion. Wait till I hear the ones I keep to myself!
Don’t let you mind wander – it’s far too small to be let out on its own