You are about as challenging as stealing candy

I have taken up photography because it’s the only hobby where I can shoot people and cut their heads off without going to jail!
Do you like the way I am? Or should I ask God to improve your taste?
If your face had ‘Welcome’ written on it, it would make a perfect doormat
I would like to apologize to anyone I have not offended. Please be patient. I will get to you shortly!
If someon Hurts You, Ignore it If You can not Ignore it, Forget it If You can not Forget, Laugh at it If You can not Laugh, You Deserve It
Sorry I didn’t text you back; Because my phone recognized your number!