My phone’s low battery
My phone’s low battery warning is the only warning I take it seriously!
I cannot bear to see
I cannot bear to see a bear Bear down upon a hare. When bare of hair he strips the hare, Right there I cry, ‘Forbear! ‘
I can FIX my PASSPORT Size
I can FIX my PASSPORT Size PHOTO in My PASSPORT Can you FIX Your STAMP Size PHOTO in a STAMP?
Friends are forever
Friends are forever, until they get in a relationship!
Normally swing underneath them
Boss: Employees like that do not grow on trees you know… You: How true Sir, they normally swing underneath them…
Real friends do not get offended
Real friends do not get offended when you insult them. They smile and call you something even more offensive!
Sheet I sit
I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit, and on the slitted sheet I sit.
Notices when you don’t
Housework: No one notices when you do it, but everyone notices when you don’t!
Drove to another party
Boy1: Yesterday I was too drunk to drive home. Boy2: So what did you do? Boy1: I drove to another party!
You are an unwanted child
You are an unwanted child. Your parents paid the medical expenses for your birth with their accident insurance.